Randomness

Every 6 weeks they take my CA-125 Blood count - which is basically a tumor marker and indicates if the cancer is returning.  Normal is 0-35 and when I was diagnosed last year my count was 686.  Six weeks ago it was at 22 and this time it had dropped to 13.5!  Yipee!  How exciting is that?!

I know the Lord is totally blessing me - because of all of your prayers...and especially my little grandchildren's prayers.  It is so precious to hear them pray for me at EVERY prayer.  "Please bless Grandma that the cancer won't ever come back!"  If I think about it too much, I could cry.  Can I really ask for that?  That basically would be asking for a miracle, and for some reason I don't think I deserve one or maybe I'm afraid to ask because if I don't get one, what would that do to my faith?  Here's how my conversation with my husband went one day:

Me:  I dont' think I deserve a miracle.
Craig:  Why not?
Me:  Because the Lord usually only gives miracles when there is a purpose surrounding it.
Craig:  So you don't think there is a purpose in you receiving a miracle?
Me:  Well, I'm just saying that why should I get a miracle when my cousin had the same type of cancer and she died from it.  Why should I be able to live when she didn't?
Craig:  Where's your faith Michele?!?!?!!?
Me: I don't want to be a pesimist, but I also want to be a realist!  I have Ovarian Cancer Stage IV and it is the type that keeps coming back!  There I said it! 
Craig: (inserting a little tough love here) Well, I guess you'll never get a miracle if you don't ever ask!

The next day my daughter called and told me to check the blog of her friend who has been battling Melanoma Cancer - Stage IV.  They have tried everything and have almost run out of options. The last couple things they did were very drastic, just to buy her more time with her husband and three sons.  She is such an inspiration to so many!  As I clicked here to read her blog, tears started rolling down my checks.  My husband stood over my shoulder and read with me the miracle that had just happened to her.  As we walked into the kitchen to start dinner he very quietly said, "did she deserve a miracle?"  I turned to him with tears in my eyes and said, "okay, okay....I will start praying for a miracle!!!!"

What would I do without my sweet husband to keep me grounded?  I want to brag on him for a minute.  Since he was layed off, we realized that he may end up needing to work from home while he looked for a job.  So we decded to set up an office for him downstairs.

 We needed a nice desk, but couldn't find anything decent that wasn't too expensive.  Since he's had some extra time on his hands, he decided to make his own desk.  Here is the finished project.  I think he did an excellent job!