Unsung Heros

Here's an update on the procedure for the tube in my lungs that was was not draining.  I had the most amazing male nurse or PA or whatever he was.  His name was Brad.  I can't tell you what an angel he was to me.  I really think these nurses and technicians and assistants work the magic and then the doctor swoops in at the last moment for the glory.  But not Brad, he was there the whole time, caring and nurturing through the pain.  We saw him first and I love the way he eliminated all the easy things first to see what might be clogging the drain.  Finally when we realized the drain looked just fine, and was sitting in the middle of what looked like Lake Michigan (as one of the ultra sound technicians described), they decided to try sending a wire up to unclog it.  If that didn't work, the last option would be to take that drain out and insert a totally new set up which would be very painful so I was more than willing to try everything else first.

When the doctor put the wire through the old tube, the minute it hit the top of the tube the fluid started flowing freely. So it looked like might have been a mucus plug or something else that was clogging it and we couldn't see it. They drained a liter of fluid off me before it really started to hurt. As I was getting ready to be wheeled out, I started to have a lot of pain in my chest and then the pain went down my left arm and my left hand got numb.  So needless to say those weren't good signs so sweet Brad grabbed the EKG machine and hooked me up to make sure I wasn't having a heart attach.  After a few minutes the pain started to subside and you could see on the EKG that everything looked okay. 

I can't tell you the relief I immediately started to feel last night and then more today from having so much fluid taken out from the insides of my body.  Today the hospice nurse came out and drained off another liter and then she was able to get the stomach pump to work and so today was a much better day than I've had all week. Thank you all for you constant prayers, love and concern.  We are so happy that it wasn't tumors that was blocking the tube.  You know it's so weird, because I know I'm going to die and so why does any of this matter?  Well, it matters because it allows me to have as much quality of life I can while still here.

PEACE COME FROM UNDERSTANDING THE PLAN OF SALVATION
It's so cute because my grand kids are so adorable the way they are processing all of this.  Each of our kids have had a Family Home Evening with their children and have talked about the Plan of Salvation in as much details as their kids have been able to understand.  Byron and Tracy's boy Carston who is 3 came into my bedroom and we had a nice little chat.  "Grandma are you going to Heaven?"  I said, "Yes I am Carston!"  Then he looked up at me with big round eyes and said, "RIGHT NOW?"  I laughed and said, "No honey, we don't know when I will go but we are just trying to be ready."  That seemed to satisfy him and he turned and ran out.

When Dan and Kyrstin talked to their 31/2 year old son Logan about the Plan of Salvation, they explained to him that when Grandma Garvin dies, she will get to go and live with Jesus.  The rest of the night, Logan was thrilled for me because I got to be with Jesus.  Oh to have so much faith!  

Amy and Steve have been doing the same thing with their kids.  Last Monday for FHE they decided to tell their children for sure that I would probably die.  There were tears and I'm sure this has to be so hard for all of my sweet grandchildren who have been praying for Grandma's cancer to go away and now we tell them that it is not going to.  I appreciate the way each of our kids are trying to help their kids accept this.  Natalie is 9 and she's their oldest and she has been so enthralled with the concept of the Second Coming of the Savior and she has started to ask so many more detailed question about that event.  It has been a great teaching moment for them. 

Last week I went over to Amy's house to spend some one-on-one time with each of the kids while I was still feeling good.  As I walked in the house all the kids came running and hugged me.  I had an arm full of things and so I walked into the kitchen to put it down on the counter.  The next thing I knew, Ryan their 2 year old came running in and said, "Maama, DIE.  Maama DIE!"  I thought I heard what he said but Amy said they mainly talked with the 3 older girls during that FHE.  So when he kept repeating this I said, "RyRy, are you saying that Grandma is going to die?"  It was so cute because his face completely relaxed when he realized that I understood what he was saying and said, "Yeah" with immediate relief in his voice.  How adorable is that!  Never under estimate the value of teaching the gospel in your home, even if the child is only 2 years old!  When I told Amy what Ryan said to me she was amazed because she said they really never spent any time talking to him about it because they felt like he was too young to comprehend.  It actually makes me cry right now as I am writing this, because of the gifts that my children are giving me, as they take the opportunity to teach my grandchildren about the Plan of Salvation and helping them gain their own personal testimony that Families really can be Together Forever!  (This picture above is of Ryan who carries around his pocket size Book of Mormon in his back pack.  When he saw me lying on the couch, he ran and got his backpack, retrieved his scriptures and flipped them open and began pretending to read from it to bring comfort to his Maama!  Oh my goodness so precious!!!!)

Charlene and Paul came to spend one last weekend with us before their school started.  They had also had the same talk about me dying, as well as the conversations I've had with them.  When they came this time, it was as if we all knew it was really going to happen for sure.  Once again I tried to give as much comfort to the older girls as I could, because they've known me longer than the rest.  When you think of it, this has been such a GIFT to be able to have all of this time to prepare for my death.  Cooper, one of the twins is quite matter of fact and loves to take things apart and see how it works and then tries to put it back together (not always successful at the sorrow of his parents).  So as their family was getting packed to leave Cooper came in and put his hands on his hips and said, "Grandma, now exactly what day are you going to die?"  I hate to choke back a laugh because he was so sincere.  He had come to say goodbye and it was time for them to go and it hadn't happened yet, so maybe in his little mind he was wondering how much longer they needed to stay.  Oh man, I love the literal way that kids think!  I finally answered and said nothing profound, "Cooper, I really don't know when I'm going to die.  I just need to make sure that I live my life everyday so I will be ready to meet God when the time comes!" Don't we all?