Visible and Nonvisable Trials

This week my feet have been killing me.  My neuropathy seems to come and go randomly without rhyme or reason.  Yesterday we went to the Timpanogos temple and I dreaded putting on my temple shoes because my feet always hurt worse because my shoes are so narrow.  As my hair has started to grow back, I’ve gotten brave and gone places with just my short hair, but I usually always wear my wig to church and the temple.  This time I decided to go to the temple without my wig for the first time!

As we sat down in the full chapel, I was a bit self conscious as I looked around and tried to avoid eye contact with too many people.  However, I couldn't help but notice a young sister sitting two rows behind me.  She had beautiful long red hair and was waving a fan back and forth in front of her face.  I smiled and then noticed that her hand was missing some fingers.  From where I was sitting I couldn't see clearly what had happened, but I thought it was so neat that she was there at the temple.  I was immediately drawn to her and wanted to know her story.  Since I've had cancer it’s interesting to note that where ever I go, I seem to feel a special "connection” with anyone else who has gone through a trial.

As we walked into the session, I went to an empty row of chairs because I like sitting on the end to have more room.  A couple minutes went by and I looked up, and there was this beautiful young woman coming to sit next to me.  How lucky....or maybe it wasn't luck and God had planned for this to happen to help me count my blessings and have an attitude adjustment.

After she sat down, I leaned over and smiled at her and said, "It's so nice to see you in the temple."  She smiled back as she looked at my hair and replied, "We (her mom was with her) thought the same thing about you!"  I explained that I had ovarian cancer and this was my first time at the temple without my wig.  I said, "At least you have hair, it is beautiful."  She whispered back to me, “the illness that took my fingers and legs and feet, also took my hair!" 

Are you kidding?  I was stunned!  How could someone go through something that traumatic and still be smiling and attending the temple?  The session started and I tried not to stare, but I couldn't believe she didn't have any legs and feet.  I stole a few glances throughout the session.  Sure enough, from her knees on down she had prosthetic legs and feet.  She didn't have any fingers on either hands, but there was enough flesh by her knuckle and where her thumb would have been, for her to hold a fan between them and fan herself.

Unbelievable!  I came to the temple complaining that my feet were killing me…and what does the Lord do to teach me?  He places me next to a woman who has no feet!  Talk about a lesson in humility!   As the session began, I quietly wiped away tears as they fell.  In my mind I said, “Thank you Lord, I get your message!”  I have been so blessed, and yet I still complain.  I asked him for forgiveness and promised that I would try to be more grateful.

As the session progressed, I started thinking about visible trials.  Both this dear sister and I had been through a lot of physical trials and it was easy for others to see.  I then thought about all the nonvisible trials that people in this session were going through and that no one knew about.  How about the sister sitting in front of me, she looked tired, just what was her story?  What was this sweet sister’s story sitting next to me?  What disease had caused her to lose her appendages and her hair?  How old is she?  Where does she live?  Is she married, does she have kids?

After the session this sister leaned over and asked me when I was diagnosed with my cancer.  I told her, and then whispered, “I would love to talk more and exchange phone numbers and share our stories with each in the dressing room.”  She nodded in agreement and smiled.  We met in the dressing room and exchanged phone numbers.  I put a call into her, but I haven't back from her yet.  I am anxious to talk with her more.

Today I realized once again that everyone struggles with things whether it is visible or not.  We struggle with sin and we struggle with trials.  It’s easier to reach out to those who we can visibly see are suffering, but those who struggle in silence need our love and support just as much.  The only way we can do this is to rely on the Holy Ghost and if we are prompted to reach out to someone, follow that prompting whether we understand why.